I know that God called me back to Canada for a reason, one that I don't completely understand yet and maybe never will, but being obedient, I followed God's calling and came back to BC, just like I was obedient when I made the decision to move to Haiti back in 2002. Now, I won't try and say that being obedient to God's calling was easy but there is something that while not easy, makes it doable because you know that what God has planned for you is far better than anything you could plan for yourself.
I have no doubt in my mind that some people think I am crazy for moving back to Canada without Ronel, and some probably think I should have stayed in Haiti and filed Ronel's immigration paperwork from there. While that seems so much easier, I know that it wasn't what God had planned for us and I have no doubt that we will be learning something through this process.
There is a day to day struggle that both Ronel and I go through. I am sure that most days it is harder on Ronel because daily he is going places or doing things that we have done together, routines that we had that are no more. I also know that there are some situations which have made life somewhat uncomfortable for him, many things changed when I moved back to BC and much of what we knew as "normal" or routine when we were both in Haiti has changed. I have things a bit easier, or so it seems to us ~ Ronel has never been to BC, and so everything I do, each and every day, have no memories connected. I can't get nostalgic about when Ronel & I went here or ate at this restaurant or miss having him attend my local church with me because he has yet to do these things with me here in BC. Yes, we did these types of activities in Haiti, but they just are not the same. I go to work, go to bible study, hang with friends and don't have the memories of when Ronel was there with me. Yes, I miss him and can't wait till we can do these activities together but when I keep myself busy, I can keep my mind active and off past memories that just make me dwell on the past and not on the present or the future. Many people ask me about Ronel and about any progress on the paperwork, and while I don't often have much to tell, that is often the hardest part! This messes up my plan to keep busy and not let myself dwell on the fact that Ronel and I are many miles apart! I do appreciate the fact that the people around me care about my life and want to know about how things are progressing, but at the same time, you only want to answer the same questions so many times. Not that I want people to stop asking, but to be considerate that some days I won't want to talk much about the progress.
At this point in time, there isn't much progress! ~ Ronel has had problems getting his medical exam done that we need for his application. First the doctor's office was closed because of Haiti's national holiday, then it was closed due to unrest in the capital city, then more holidays for Carnival - closed for more than a week (at a time when Ronel had time off school which made it more frustrating!) and now the doctor's office said maybe the end of this month, but Ronel needs to be able to have a day off work and may need more than one day in Port-au-Prince to complete everything needed for his exam. On a good note, he has sent in to get his police report done and is going to be getting his photos done that he needs for all of this paperwork, if I remember right, I think that Ronel needs like 20 immigration photos done!! (somewhat similar to passport photos, but a slightly different size I think)
I keep telling myself that God is in charge of this whole process and He was there when Ronel got his passport done and in his hands in ONE DAY! This is not something that happens, here or in Haiti, but definitely not in Haiti. I remember when I was living in Haiti, we needed to get a passport done for a staff member so that they could travel with Karen to the Dominican Republic and it took forever to get it done! This was one of the reasons that Ronel started on his so early (even before we were married) - we wanted to make sure that he had lots of time and we weren't delayed in filing our paperwork because of his passport, and God had that situation taken care of! I still smile when I think about the fact that he had it in his hand the same day he took in the paperwork! I remember that phone call - Ronel was so happy and I almost cried from joy! I know that God can do miracles, He has done them in my life and I won't forget that too easily but sometimes, when things get difficult, I find myself forgetting those moments in my life and only looking at the difficult times. This is when I am thankful for the friends in my life! The ones who gently remind me of the things that God has done in my life and the things that He is still doing daily in my life. The ones that just give me a hug when they can tell by my face that I am not having a good day, that faithfully continue to pray for Ronel, myself and that the paperwork will be processed as quickly as possible.
I have no idea when Ronel & I will get to live in the same house together, I have my hopes - I would like for Ronel to be in Canada by January 1st, 2009. Now I don't want to hear that I'm crazy, but this is my way of keeping optimistic. If Ronel arrives even one day before that, then that is one day that we have been given as a gift! If I said that Ronel would be here by November 1st, 2007 and he didn't arrive then, I would most likely be miserable as each day after that passed without Ronel here. I am sure that many of you would have your own way of dealing with this, but this is currently mine and I retain all rights to change my mind at any time about how I deal with this!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment