Wow,
it has already been a year that Ronel & I have been husband & wife! Some days it seems longer than that, and other days it seems a lot shorter! We had hoped & prayed that we would be together by this time but that wasn't the plan apparently! Good news though, the paperwork is on its way to me here! Ronel got his medical done & Val picked up all the papers on Sunday (our actual anniversary - I told her that it was the best gift anyone could have given me - other than having Ronel here and since that isn't possible or quite legal, getting the papers is AWESOME!) and emailed me that she mailed them today and I will have them in 2 business days (so should be here Monday)
The money is sitting in my bank account ready to go and I just need to make sure I organize all of the paperwork I need to send in - thankfully I didn't need to do anything like Ronel did - no medical exams, no police checks, nothing - just write out how we met, answer some other questions and send in letters & photos of us (which is the hardest part - copying all of our letters and getting copies of my phone bills & Skype calls) I will need to get some photos printed this weekend because I am NOT sending them any of my copies - I only want to send copies in case I don't have the original digital file!
I had a hard, emotional week last week and Sunday morning was hard, but after a nice long chat with Ronel, my outlook was more positive! Being here in BC, not able to do anything and trying to help facilitate the pickup of the paperwork was not easy. And if Val wasn't able to pick up the papers, after Ronel getting his medical done would mean that we would be wasting valuable days while trying to get the papers out to me. The medical exam is only valid for ONE YEAR - so Ronel had his exam done Oct 31st ( and picked it up on the 5th of November - not sure which date counts) and that means if our application is approved by next Oct 31st, Ronel will need to redo the medical exam and that will set us back time wise, plus the cost of having to redo the exam. Thankfully our God is bigger than any immigration application and can have this whole process done by then and we are praying that Ronel is home with me here in BC by next fall but realistically the paperwork says it can take 6-18 months and so if I file by the end of November, that means approval could be anywhere from May 2008 until May 2009. I would be ECSTATIC if Ronel was here by this summer but, in trying to remain positive and not set myself up to be hurt or sad, I would be happy as long as he is here by the end of 2008! I turn 30 in February 2009 (wow, feels weird to write that down!) and I want my husband home to celebrate that with me! Anniversaries, Christmases - we will have many of those together, but a girl only turns 30 once and I want to be able to share that with Ronel. Now to some of you that may seem trivial or weird, but that is okay with me, in order to survive being separated from my husband, I had to have something solid to hang on to, something that was attainable and also reasonable. Having Ronel home by the end of 2008 (in time for my 30th birthday - so even Jan. 2009 would be do-able but obviously sooner is better!) was that "thing" for me. Yes, I could have said, by our first anniversary and for a while I did hold onto that, but as it became clear that there were setbacks we had to overcome, both here & in Haiti, that was less and less reasonable for me. And, as our anniversary has passed and we haven't even be able to file yet, that seems like it was a God thing that I didn't continue to hold onto that as I would have been disappointed and the wait would be harder to handle.
God has taught me a lot through this process, most of it probably isn't obvious to most of you, but I do know that there are some of my close friends who can see the work that God has been doing in my life. Being patient and waiting on God is one of those things, Ronel always has told me that I need to learn to be more patient and never in million years would I have thought that this would be how I would learn that! But, there is a lot in this immigration process that I can have NO control over, I can't hurry things along, I just have to sit back and wait - whether I like it or not, I can pray, I can make sure that I have what I need - paperwork, etc -filled out to the best of our ability. But once I have sent in our application, my hands-on part in this process is done, all I can do after that is pray, until I get the news that we have been approved (because I can't even begin to think that we won't be!) Once we have been approved, then I have more that I can do - booking flights, finding us our own place, getting time off work, etc. but that time in between when I send in the application until the approval, I can only wait, pray and believe that God's hand in on this whole thing. And I do believe that God's hand is in the midst of this whole process, but sometimes when I am in the midst of it, I can push that thought to the back of my mind and forget that it is He who is in control, not me! Thankfully God has surrounded me with a fabulous group of supportive friends who often help remind me of that fact, but who are also there encouraging me, comforting me and just all around loving on me. Friends who know not to ask "how are you?" on our anniversary because they knew I wasn't okay, I missed my husband and just want him here with me, friends who know when I just need a hug and nothing else, who know that this whole process has made me more emotional that ever and that some days I just need a shoulder to cry on, that it isn't anything someone did or said but that I am just missing Ronel. Friends who know that I will be sad and lonely on our anniversary & plan a spa day with a masseuse and surprise me with a day of friendship, fun, laughter and a hour long full body massage! Without God & the friends He has blessed me with, I would be a miserable mess right now. And I am so grateful that I am not - that I don't have to be, that I can turn to my Heavenly Father and He is there to comfort me in my times of need.
Well, this post got a lot longer and way more intense than I planned! But it is what it is - it is a look at my life and how I am dealing with celebrating a year of marriage, but being apart from my husband for 11 1/2 months! Hopefully I can sometime soon write a post that says we've been approved and Ronel is coming to BC, but until that day, I will continue to learn how to be patient and wait....
it has already been a year that Ronel & I have been husband & wife! Some days it seems longer than that, and other days it seems a lot shorter! We had hoped & prayed that we would be together by this time but that wasn't the plan apparently! Good news though, the paperwork is on its way to me here! Ronel got his medical done & Val picked up all the papers on Sunday (our actual anniversary - I told her that it was the best gift anyone could have given me - other than having Ronel here and since that isn't possible or quite legal, getting the papers is AWESOME!) and emailed me that she mailed them today and I will have them in 2 business days (so should be here Monday)
The money is sitting in my bank account ready to go and I just need to make sure I organize all of the paperwork I need to send in - thankfully I didn't need to do anything like Ronel did - no medical exams, no police checks, nothing - just write out how we met, answer some other questions and send in letters & photos of us (which is the hardest part - copying all of our letters and getting copies of my phone bills & Skype calls) I will need to get some photos printed this weekend because I am NOT sending them any of my copies - I only want to send copies in case I don't have the original digital file!
I had a hard, emotional week last week and Sunday morning was hard, but after a nice long chat with Ronel, my outlook was more positive! Being here in BC, not able to do anything and trying to help facilitate the pickup of the paperwork was not easy. And if Val wasn't able to pick up the papers, after Ronel getting his medical done would mean that we would be wasting valuable days while trying to get the papers out to me. The medical exam is only valid for ONE YEAR - so Ronel had his exam done Oct 31st ( and picked it up on the 5th of November - not sure which date counts) and that means if our application is approved by next Oct 31st, Ronel will need to redo the medical exam and that will set us back time wise, plus the cost of having to redo the exam. Thankfully our God is bigger than any immigration application and can have this whole process done by then and we are praying that Ronel is home with me here in BC by next fall but realistically the paperwork says it can take 6-18 months and so if I file by the end of November, that means approval could be anywhere from May 2008 until May 2009. I would be ECSTATIC if Ronel was here by this summer but, in trying to remain positive and not set myself up to be hurt or sad, I would be happy as long as he is here by the end of 2008! I turn 30 in February 2009 (wow, feels weird to write that down!) and I want my husband home to celebrate that with me! Anniversaries, Christmases - we will have many of those together, but a girl only turns 30 once and I want to be able to share that with Ronel. Now to some of you that may seem trivial or weird, but that is okay with me, in order to survive being separated from my husband, I had to have something solid to hang on to, something that was attainable and also reasonable. Having Ronel home by the end of 2008 (in time for my 30th birthday - so even Jan. 2009 would be do-able but obviously sooner is better!) was that "thing" for me. Yes, I could have said, by our first anniversary and for a while I did hold onto that, but as it became clear that there were setbacks we had to overcome, both here & in Haiti, that was less and less reasonable for me. And, as our anniversary has passed and we haven't even be able to file yet, that seems like it was a God thing that I didn't continue to hold onto that as I would have been disappointed and the wait would be harder to handle.
God has taught me a lot through this process, most of it probably isn't obvious to most of you, but I do know that there are some of my close friends who can see the work that God has been doing in my life. Being patient and waiting on God is one of those things, Ronel always has told me that I need to learn to be more patient and never in million years would I have thought that this would be how I would learn that! But, there is a lot in this immigration process that I can have NO control over, I can't hurry things along, I just have to sit back and wait - whether I like it or not, I can pray, I can make sure that I have what I need - paperwork, etc -filled out to the best of our ability. But once I have sent in our application, my hands-on part in this process is done, all I can do after that is pray, until I get the news that we have been approved (because I can't even begin to think that we won't be!) Once we have been approved, then I have more that I can do - booking flights, finding us our own place, getting time off work, etc. but that time in between when I send in the application until the approval, I can only wait, pray and believe that God's hand in on this whole thing. And I do believe that God's hand is in the midst of this whole process, but sometimes when I am in the midst of it, I can push that thought to the back of my mind and forget that it is He who is in control, not me! Thankfully God has surrounded me with a fabulous group of supportive friends who often help remind me of that fact, but who are also there encouraging me, comforting me and just all around loving on me. Friends who know not to ask "how are you?" on our anniversary because they knew I wasn't okay, I missed my husband and just want him here with me, friends who know when I just need a hug and nothing else, who know that this whole process has made me more emotional that ever and that some days I just need a shoulder to cry on, that it isn't anything someone did or said but that I am just missing Ronel. Friends who know that I will be sad and lonely on our anniversary & plan a spa day with a masseuse and surprise me with a day of friendship, fun, laughter and a hour long full body massage! Without God & the friends He has blessed me with, I would be a miserable mess right now. And I am so grateful that I am not - that I don't have to be, that I can turn to my Heavenly Father and He is there to comfort me in my times of need.
Well, this post got a lot longer and way more intense than I planned! But it is what it is - it is a look at my life and how I am dealing with celebrating a year of marriage, but being apart from my husband for 11 1/2 months! Hopefully I can sometime soon write a post that says we've been approved and Ronel is coming to BC, but until that day, I will continue to learn how to be patient and wait....
3 comments:
Oh Theresa!
I am so anxious for all things to work out soon!
It is good that you are using this time to learn and grow, thank you for inspiring us to do the same, to trust God with our presents, and not just our futures.
I am glad that what I am going through can be an inspiration to others - I know that both Ronel & I are learning & growing through this and that God is working in both of our lives, though we are thousands of miles apart!
While I know it seems like it has been so long since this started, I am just so happy that there is finally going to be some action done and getting the application filed is such a HUGE step and a milestone as well, the fact that the paperwork will be able to be filed before the end of 2007 makes me SO happy!
wow ... i had no idea ... what a long wait --- i will be praying about this --- stay strong.
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